sarahlynch — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 02:26:34 +0000

Not that anyone will have noticed, but out of sheer embarassment I have deleted all of my previous blog posts. I know I should just get over it, and leave them so I can look at them later and laugh, but I think that if I keep them, I”ll just look back and be a little pissed off because I was so mean, and obnoxious. And unenlightened. Uh. Yeah. I was just fucking annoying. And I wondered why I had no friends then. Hahahaha. Well. I’m glad I’m not like that now.

Ahhh. Bye.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder?

sarahlynch — Sat, 31 Jan 2009 06:18:40 +0000

Why do they call is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? What does disorder really mean? Let’s find out.

dis⋅or⋅der

–noun

1.	lack of order or regular arrangement; confusion: Your room is in utter disorder.

2.	an irregularity: a disorder in legal proceedings.

3.	breach of order; disorderly conduct; public disturbance.

4.	a disturbance in physical or mental health or functions; malady or dysfunction: a mild stomach disorder.

5.	to destroy the order or regular arrangement of; disarrange.

6.	to derange the physical or mental health or functions of.

Lack of order? Hm. So, what normal humans call order is nonexistent in people with OCD?

Well, I don’t think that there is such a thing as order in this place we call home. Nothing is in order.

Ok, next one. An irregularity? Well if I think that there is no such thing as order then how can there be something regular? There are TOO many of us, nothing is regular, because one humans regular is different to another humans regular. So maybe the regular of an OCD person is “the” regular. OK. Public Disturbance can’t be the definition of disorder that is used in OCD.

“A disturbance in physical or mental health or functions.” That could work. But then back to what people think is regular. Well maybe what I am thinking doesn’t work. Because then that would be nothing is anything because there is too many of us. When I saw health I thought, YEAH that’s it! But is OCD really something that has to do with health? Does OCD have to do with your brain? Well, uh duh, it has to right? It can’t be a personal choice… can it? See, I’m trying to figure out 1. Why it’s a disorder. 2. Is it in your brain? 3. What is it exactly.

So, let’s leave this definition and figure out if OCD is in your brain.

Obsessions are intrusive, irrational thoughts — unwanted ideas or impulses that repeatedly well up in a person’s mind. Again and again, the person experiences disturbing thoughts

That makes sense. They are–yeah I’m OCD.

Let’s skip that because that just answered my question. It’s not so much in your mind as much as you just put it there.

SARAH’S OCD
-I have to pull back the shower curtain because someone might be behind it and kill me.
-I look under the bed because someone might be under there and kill me.
-I can’t let my foot touch the cracks on pavement, they have to get right up to the crack but not touch it.
-I can’t put my back to the door because someone might come and stab my back.
-I sit in indian style in the car when it’s dark, because midgets will come and eat off my legs.

There’s several others. But too many to name right now.

That’s it Sarah’s Obsessive Compulsive.

Buttermilk Concrete

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder?

dis⋅or⋅der